Now that it's just us

I have been dying to update my blog! But since we aren't telling main stream people yet and the one thing that's on our mind is the pregnancy I had to make my blog private. (At least for now) So now I can breathe a sigh of relief and get some of this stuff off my chest. It's better that I do it on here so I don't bore my husband.

So those of you that are reading this I ask you NOT to share it with others. I will let you know when I make the blog public again. This is to keep you all updated and to give you prayer requests and of course praise reports!! 

Now here's the background story:

Hubby and I have been "trying" for 13 months. We had a loss in march at 4 weeks. My mom and grandma both had a history of not easily getting pregnant so I'm not surprised that it wasn't easy for me. Hubby and I had an appt. with a specialists to hopefully figure out what was going on and find out what our next step would be. Our appointment was on october 1st, we found out we were pregnant on september 29. It was so overwhelming to see the test come back positive.  Hubby had to hold me because I was shaking. There in the bathroom we held each other and scott prayed to God thanking Him for the life that He had created in my womb without the help of doctors!!!

I've been going to appointments every week since week 4. I am now week 6. I have had 3 sonograms thus far. Each sonogram we can see the progress of the pregnancy. The first one we could only see the thickening of my lining. The second we saw a sac and a fetal pole. This last one I got to see the heart beat!!!! 

Seeing the heart beat was incredible! I am so thankful that God let me see it! I was overwhelmed with emotion. The nurse was even thanking God. 

I have been put on a progesterone supplement. After a week of being on the supplement my progesterone  levels are still low but they are moving up! 

Thank you for your faithfulness in praying for this baby. Please continue to be praying for the life God has so graciously placed in my womb. Pray that He will continue to grow this baby to term and that my progesterone levels to start rising!

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Not Me Monday

This is a fun time of "confessing"...but of course I would never do any of these things. ;) Check back every monday for new "not me" posts!

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I did not impulsively buy a complete new guest bathroom shower curtain, towels, and other accessories. No I would never!

I did not wake up on saturday morning and then go back to sleep for 3 more hours! 

And of course I did not turn my phone off to shut the world out. That doesn't sound like me. :)

I did not spend a whole afternoon reading other friends blogs when I had laundry to do and other household duties. 

I did not beg my sister to spend the night with me because I don't like being alone when my husband is on a business trip..... nope!

Click here to see the host of this blog carnival. 

A change in perspective.

(this picture is from our wedding day when he first saw me)

My husband travels for work frequently. I started realizing in the year and a half we've been married that when he's gone my house is so clean!

Now before you start thinking this is a husband bashing post stay with me!

After my realization I started nagging him a lot more. No shoes on the floor, close the doors to the cabinets, pick up your clothes off the floor, don't leave dishes in the sink, etc. (You know every husband's worst nightmare) I was focusing on all the extra work I was having to do. But then God sweetly reminded me of something I read in a book one time. It said something to the effect... snoring is music to a widow's ears. A new perspective enters..

Honestly I would rather spend an extra 15 minutes total a day doing those extra things if it meant my husband was home with me. It is an honor to pick up the shoes of the man that selflessly works hard to provide a good home for his family. It is an honor to hear him snoring next to me because I know that he is there. It is an honor to clean up after the man that loved me so much he changed jobs to be home more. I appreciate everything that he daily does to help me and love me. I am blessed far beyond what I deserve to be married to a man such as him. 

Thank you Lord for the gift you gave me in my husband. Remind me daily to look for ways to serve and honor him. 

What if...

What if we didn't see the pregnant teenager, the poor kid, the fat girl, or the girl that's too skinny? What if we didn't see the nerdy kid, the rich kid, the cheerleader, or the band kid? What if we didn't see the black person, mexican, asian or any ethnicity? What if we didn't see the infertile woman, the plain jane, or the girl that causes all the drama? What if we didn't see the sexual abuse victim, physical abuse victim or the burn victim? What if we didn't see the person behind the counter, the person there to serve us? What if we didn't see the person who cut us off or wrecked into us? 

What if instead of giving a person our own label, we label them creations of God Himself that deserve our time. What if we could stop judging and starting seeing every person as a person? If we slowed down our lives enough and open our eyes we will see many opportunities we have each day to show Christ's love. I can only imagine the how many I have missed in the busyness of life. I am not only talking about strangers. People in our ministry you may not know well...anyone!

She's home!

Katie's first night was last night. She did great! She only got up once. She was having a hard time adjusting to her new home but this morning she's been doing better. We're excited that she's actually home!!

I thought this was interesting...

Oprah's interview

This is obviously an edited version but it makes some good points.

I love these people! These are just some of the students that went on the mission trip to Florida with us. These students are amazing! You want to be in the trenches with these people. They love the Lord and have a heart for the lost. God used them to share His love and lead 25 kids to the Him. It was great to see them all again last night. They shared stories of what God taught them on our trip and how it changed their life. Little do they know how much they taught me! God used them in my life during a trial to teach me a little something about love. Hopefully I can stay in touch with all of them. God is good! 

Meet Katie....

            Here is Katie our newest addition! She is a full blooded lab.

My spirit fails...

"Therefore I am going to allure her; I will lead her into the desert and speak tenderly to her. There I will give her back her vineyards, and will make the Valley of Achor a door of hope. There she will sing as in the days of her youth, as in the day she came out of Egypt.

In the day, declares the Lord ,you will call me 'my husband' and no longer call me my master."

Hosea 2:14-16

While in the desert this has been my prayer:

I stretch out my hands to You. My soul longs for You, as a parched land. Selah. Answer me quickly, O Lord, my spirit fails; Do not hide Your face from me, Or I will become like those who go down to the pit. Let me hear Your lovingkindness in the morning; For I trust in You; Teach me the way I should walk; For to You I lift up my soul. Psalm 143

This summer God led me into the desert. He asked me to confront my deepest and darkest pain. The pain that I had never laid at His feet. I still felt as if it was somehow my fault. I was six years old...... it wasn't my fault. I had sat my faith on top of the pain hoping to cover it up. But God wanted to expose it and expel it. (dark places in my heart) As painful as this process has been I can now say I somewhat enjoyed the pilgrimage. I am still on this pilgrimage. I am learning to love deeper, to trust my Father, to mourn the loss of a childhood, and to experience real joy! I am finding that my identity is not found in people or my life experiences but in Him. 

My grandpa was a pastor and my grandma was the piano player. When I hear old hymns it takes me back to hearing him preach and my grandmother sing. I have recently been not just singing but listening with my heart to the words. One in particular struck a cord with me. 

Because He lives I can face tomorrow

Because He lives all fear is gone

Because I know He holds the future

and life is worth the living just because He lives

AMEN!